Why Most City Girls Perceive All Luyia Men As “shirandulas” And Bedroom Bullies

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luyia man
luyia man

Two weeks ago,PLUS254  ran an article on tribes that make good husbands as well as different tribes who their women are stereotyped in the community

Women have responded by revealing what tribal stereotypes say about luyia men, reasons which may or may not influence their choice of the future father of their children.

Some traits that cut across men from this tribe can make you laugh, even when you are not in good mood. Others are heavily borrowed from their neighbours,Kisii and Luo.

While some of these perceptions might not exactly be gospel truth, others are right on the money; literally.

Who is a luyia man?

Most gate ‘soldiers’ in Nairobi are Shirandulas. How they manage to attract more than three wives; two in Emanyulia, Kakamega, and a ‘nyumba ndogo’ in Nairobi’s seedy Kawangware  is a mystery social scientists are still working on. Luhya men are ambitious though. Even a 40-year old Omundu strong watchman still hopes to steal his employer’s job before Vision 2030. And a promotion will surely ease the burden of bringing up families besides moving houses from Kawangware!

Positive:

Depending on your libido, make sure your bed is strong enough to accommodate these bedroom bullies who according to testimonials, hardly run out of tea and chicken powered steam.  Luhyas do not like leaving evidence around so do not worry about child support when he leaves you. Luhyas are the real Africans. He will always come bearing gifts from shagz; mkarango, ingokho, guavas and sugarcane!

Negative:

Always dancing to Rhumba as they discuss their amazement of the Kikuyu fiscal success story. They also love going shagz every other weekend. They eat too much Jimbi. They are very traditional with a grinding domestic mindset…if the wife threatens to run away, they slaughter everyone before unsuccessfully trying to commit suicide!